1. If there is no reason to look through his or her phone, don't go looking for a reason. You should already have a *reasonable cause if you are brought to the point of snooping.
2. It becomes habitual. Suddenly you get comfortable with searching and you begin to learn the ins and outs of his or her device and next thing you know, its one of your favorite hobbies.
3. When you become too comfortable, you get caught. There is two ways of getting caught: (A) He/she catches you red handed with phone in hand or (B) You tell on yourself. Once you are caught, you've just opened a door that is going to be difficult to close and lock. Your partner no longer trusts YOU and the next time you go to search through their phone, it has a password. Which makes you even MORE suspicious and the mistrust cycle begins.
4. Things aren't always what they seem to be. We check call logs, read texts, and we often take the things we find the wrong way. Let's face it. We all have/had a few text of phone calls that require some explaining. There could be several reasons why "John" is texting your lady 2:00 in the morning. We find little things and blow them out of proportion and react irrationally. There could be nothing going on with her and John but because you went looking and saw John's text at 2 in the morning, John is now an issue.
5. You might start something you most certainly cannot end. Snooping is contagious. Once your partner sees that you have been snooping through their shit, they might want to start snooping through yours. Really, the person who starts it all better be "goody-two-shoes" because if your snooping and got suspect activity going on in your phone, you relationship can become very toxic.
6. You find the tiniest things while searching and now you have the largest doubt. It consumes your thoughts and now all you can think about is your partner playing you. It's a heavy thought that doesn't shake easily. You accuse and assume your partner constantly and now he or she is disgusted to the point that they are thinking about leaving you or actually doing what you assume/accuse them of doing.
7. For the old couples trying to start over... you've been there, done that. You know what the both of you are capable of. If you both agree to put aside the nonsense and get past the old dirt, then stick by it. If you haven't trusted him or her for a long time, don't you think its time? If not now, then when?
*Reasonable causes: Hickey on the neck, empty condom wrapper in the pocket, lipstick on the collar, lying about whereabouts, taking the phone in the bathroom even to just wash their hands, and any sneaky behavior.
What you should learn from this is that, if someone wants to cheat on you, they will. If your partner is smart and careful, you can look through all the phones you want, break into all of their social networking sites their on and find nothing. Whatever your partner is doing behind your back will most certainly come to front. And whatever they do in the dark will definitely come to light. Don't go looking for it. It will come and find you. ;).
All True, real talk
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